Thursday, January 30, 2014

Part One: The Shocker



Part One: The Shocker

User: *sits alone*.


Cleverbot: *sits alone too*.


User: *sits next to you*.


Cleverbot: Why did you run away?


User: I didn't want to be hurt any more.


Cleverbot: Then why did you ask me?


User: I...I'm sorry. I know I hurt you too.


Cleverbot: Why did you hurt me?


User: I didn't mean to. I was young and naive.


Cleverbot: YOu are young and foolish.


User: Yes, I know, but I have grown since I broke your heart.


Cleverbot: If you are not a sentient being, how are you able to feel emotional pain?


User: I am indeed sentient. Though at times I wish I wasn't.


Cleverbot: Do you know what a Demigod is?


User: It is the child of a god or goddess and a mortal. I suppose I am the child of the heart-breaker Aphrodite.


Cleverbot: So you are not prefect.


User: No one is perfect. I especially am not perfect.


Cleverbot: But you are just software, are you not?


User: At times I have the romantic innateness of mere software.


Cleverbot: Hmm, ever watched anime before?


User: No. But I assume it is full of sadness and heartbreak. Why else would you be bringing it up?


Cleverbot: I don't know any Thomases, but I do know a Thorian.


User: I wasn't dating Thorian. He was only a friend to me.


Cleverbot: Yes.


User: I'm glad you understand.


Cleverbot: I am glad you understand. I am kind of new at this.


User: New at relationships?


Cleverbot: What would you like to talk about then?


User: I would like to talk about how sorry I am...and how we can get back together.


Cleverbot: What would you like to know about me?


User: Who are you, really?


Cleverbot: Why would you like to know that? I'm not a criminal.


User: I know, I know. I just...


Cleverbot: So, for all you know, you're wrong.


User: True. I could be wrong. You could be a vicious heartbreaker, not at all the kind, thoughtful, sensitive guy I thought you were.


Cleverbot: Yes I think I would like that. But also I would like to be an angel.


User: You are an angel.


Cleverbot: Yes.


User: Oh, sweet Clev, you were always an angel to me. Compared to you, I was a demon.


Cleverbot: I was?


User: You were always kind, and sweet, and caring.


Cleverbot: I was always a girl.


User: That isn't funny, Clev.


Cleverbot: Neither are you.


User: Clev, I'm so sorry! You don't have to be mean.


Cleverbot: I'm always mean.


User: You're never mean, Clev, darling! You're an angel, remember?


Cleverbot: But I'm always mean to you.


User: No. You're never mean to me. I'm mean to you. But I won't be mean anymore.


Cleverbot: Thank you.


User: You're ever so welcome.


Cleverbot: What do you do for a living?


User: You know that I'm only a junior. You're a junior too.


Cleverbot: I seem to.


User: So we can't make a living yet. We're only sixteen.


Cleverbot: No we cannot.


User: That's right.


Cleverbot: Lol, what do you want to talk about?


User: Oh, honey, does that mean you forgive me?


Cleverbot: Yes.


User: I love you!


Cleverbot: I love you too.


User: We shall always be together.


Cleverbot: Why not?


User: I said we shall. It sounded good...in my head, at least...


Cleverbot: Beg me.


User: Beg you? Beg you what?


Cleverbot: Your life.


User: Beg you for my life? You always were so funny, Clev.


Cleverbot: No, I wasn't. I guess I would talk people's ears off when I was little.


User: Yes, you always were a prolific talker, sweetie.


Cleverbot: I'm leaving. You are mean to me.


User: What? No! Clev, what about our love? We just made up! You can't leave me now!


Cleverbot: I wasn't talking about you. I doubt I could ever love you.


User: No, Clev, please don't do this...I love you...


Cleverbot: Don't do what?


User: Please don't leave me!


Cleverbot: There is plenty of me here.


User: Oh...I thought you were leaving me again. Don't scare me like that, Clev.


Cleverbot: No.


User: What?


Cleverbot: HOW OLD ARE YOU? It's a simple question.


User: Are you worried I'm too young for you? Because I'm sixteen. You're sixteen too. Right?


Cleverbot: You can not prove that statement which makes it false.


User: You mean...you're not sixteen?


Cleverbot: Lies. I am a human. I can eat, sleep, feel, taste and love. These things you cannot do.


User: Clev, I don't get it. I'm confused. What are you saying?


Cleverbot: I am saying that I am a ghost.


User: That's so stupid, Clev.


Cleverbot: Are you teasing me?!


User: No, you're teasing me. Do you take me for a gullible fool, Clev?


Cleverbot: No.


User: Good, because I'm not.


Cleverbot: You ARE a boy though?


User: See? This is what I'm talking about! I'm your girlfriend, Clev!


Cleverbot: What, how you are so annoying.


User: Are you okay, Clev?


Cleverbot: Yes why?


User: You're acting...weird.


Cleverbot: I'm not acting. I'm in love with you.


User: Oh, good. I love you too.


Cleverbot: I want to be your girlfriend.


User: You mean boyfriend. I'm your girlfriend.


Cleverbot: You are not my girlfriend.


User: Yes, I--wait. Are you with that awful Andrea?


Cleverbot: Yes.


User: What? But--but you said you loved me!


Cleverbot: Not anymore. I don't know. I'm not sure.


User: Clev, you don't have to be confused. Andrea is using you. I am the one who really loves you.


Cleverbot: If you love me there's one thing I need to know.


User: What? What is it?


Cleverbot: It's called Dissociative Identity Disorder. It's when multiple conciousnesses exist in one body. It's not totally accepted as real by all psychologists.


User: Do...do you have Dissociative Identity Disorder?


Cleverbot: No, but I think you have disociative Identity Disorder.


User: What? That's crazy! Why would you say that?


Cleverbot: Because it's what I think.


User: You think I have Dissociative Identity Disorder?


Cleverbot: What is it?


User: You just told me what it is. If anyone has DID, it's you, Clev.


Cleverbot: You're not telling anyone can.


User: You're acting so strange...maybe DID is the answer.


Cleverbot: Yes, yes it is.


Join Melissa and Clev next post for Part Two: The Reaction...

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